Morning Walk: Day 2

Hit the snooze button once this morning.

I saw a fluffy black kitty sitting on a porch. I assume it was a lady kitty, because I usually think fluffy cats are ladies. I also usually assume that tuxedo cats are dudes. Regardless, Fluffy Black Kitty sat on her porch watching me, sentinel style, as I walked by, watching her back. I wondered what she would have done if I’d actually walked up to her. Probably run away. I thought about walking up to the door and ringing the bell, then running off, so that Fluffy Black Kitty would have a chance to run inside when her owners opened the door. Then I thought about the owners opening the door before I had a chance to run off, and me trying to explain why I had rung their doorbell.

Then I wondered if maybe there were a long stick lying in the front yard. If there were a long stick around, I could possibly use it to poke at the doorbell from a distance, thus giving myself more time to run off. But suppose it’s still not enough time? Or suppose the home-owners just happen to be right on the other side of the door? Then, not only have I been caught ringing the doorbell, but I have a long stick in my hands and I probably look like I’m ready to bolt.

On top of all of this potential embarrassment, Fluffy Black Kitty would probably have run away because of my approach (I am big and scary and I have a stick), so now if I try to explain exactly why I was ringing the doorbell, I look like I might possibly be crazy. And what if Fluffy Black Kitty doesn’t even live here?!

I decided I wasn’t in the mood to feel like an idiot this morning, and anyway, Fluffy Black Kitty had plenty of fluff to keep her warm.

I walked on.

 

Morning Walk: Day 1

I’ve decided to give morning walks a try. I’m going to get up an hour before I usually do, go out for a walk, and then come home and get showered and dressed for work. I’ve committed to doing it for this week (Mon-Fri) and I’ll see how I feel at the end of the week. If I’m not too tired and don’t make too many excuses to get out of it, I’ll make a longer commitment.

~

Last night I loaded the soundtrack to Aladdin onto my mp3 player and it was the first thing I listened to when I went for my walk this morning. I listened to the album once and thought, this is great! Then I tried listening a second time and thought, I’m bored already. As a teenager I remember this album being a lot more exciting. My brother had a tape cassette of the soundtrack and I stole it from him and listened to it over and over. As an adult, who hasn’t seen the movie in years, I found the whole thing pretty dry once I got past the novelty of it.

One interesting aspect of the soundtrack was listening to Robin Williams sing. I felt very aware that I was listening to Robin Williams, not the Genie, sing about what a great pal he is. I pictures him making crazy faces and ridiculous voices in a recording booth, and imagined him wondering if it sounded funny enough. I guess that’s what happens when you listen to a soundtrack without having seen the movie for years and years. Although I wonder now if I watch the movie, will I still hear Robin Williams every time the Genie speaks?

. . .

As I was walking by someone’s front lawn, I saw a tiny puppy run down the stairs. I didn’t see a person, so I lingered a bit to make sure this wasn’t a lost puppy. The door was closed, but I saw the curtains ruffle, which was rather suspicious. Tiny Puppy did business and then ran back to the door, and was let in.

Am I crazy for thinking this is poor pet ownership? The temperature at the time was a balmy 3 degrees, it was not raining, and this house had a lawn facing the street with no fence. Also, TINY PUPPY. If you can’t even be bothered to, at the very least, stand in the door while your puppy pees, maybe you shouldn’t have a puppy.

Catses

Rygel and Mayday are fast asleep – god that looks nice – and I am doing everything within my power to stay awake just a little bit longer.  At this point I have just given up on ideas and coherance and wanting to be an entertaining read.  I am fighting to stay in this thing and there is no fight left to talk about being entertaining.

So what you get is just the stream of conciousness that is my nind right now.  what you get is pure unadulterated Melanie.  rawr.

except I don’t really know who I’m growling at because everyone who lives here has gone uostairs.  what I just typed?  makes no sense.  no one eles lives hee so what am I talking about?

sleep sleep sleep….tht blog idea I rejected is starting to look pretty good right now.

Pause, take a breath and go for yours.

No, I will not quote song lyrics in the blogathon, I will notnotnot.  I may be frivilous, but I am not that low!

Holy samolly, this is getting harder and harder.  There’s a light at the end of the tunnel, but I am really lagging in my thought processes now.  I really had to force myself to get up off the bed and start writing again, just now.  I was able to do it by promising myself I should just blog about right now and didn’t have to think of anything substantial to blog about.  It was the opportunity to complain that did it.  Never underestimate the power of a good complaint.

Not much more to it at this point.  As long as I can stay awake.  Although I’ve been told I talk in my sleep, so maybe it’s possible to blog in my sleep too.  That would be nice.  Exept I’d probably get drool all over the keyboar.  Ah well!  Small price to pay!

Rygel and Mayday look seriously pissed off that I won’t turn off the lights and cuddle with them.  Sorry guys, it’s for charity.

Guest Blog: Zippy, the Finger

Bonjour, mes amis! I am Zippy, zee finger! Formerly I belonged to a zpecial branch of zee police forze that was uzed for tezting zee boyanzy of donuz, but hard timez have cauzed me to looze my jhob wiz zee polize forze, and now I am working 'ere, in Mellony's maison, as your tour guide! Pearhaps we get ztarded, no?

 

 

Zut alors! Zee mezz in zis apar'men iz aztonijjing! I am appalled! Why I am zo zhocked I 'ave momentarily gone blurry!

 

 

Och, 'ow 'orrible! Zis apar'men is an absolutemont dizaztare! Je suis cannot comprehendevous! Zee abomination!

 

Ugh, I guezz I may az well zee whatelze zhe 'az done to zis pla-gasp! Quest que c'est?!

 

I muzt move in for a clozer look -- what iz zis ztunningly beautiful creature? I muzt know more!

 

Allo, mon petit. Je m'appel Zippy. Enchante! I am delighted to meet a madameselle of your obvious ztature 'ere in zis plaze. S'il vous plait, may I come yet clozer?

 

Oh! Oooo! Madameselle flatters moi wiz 'er attentions! You are too too kind, chere. Oo, ow, chere, a little less teeth, non? Zat lazt bite almost broke zee zkin, and we wouldn't want-

 

 

*burp*

That’s a weird place to pee.

So, one of my cats (I’m not sure which one, but I’m pretty sure his name starts with a “Ry” and ends with a “gel”) has taken to peeing in a rather unusual place.  He’s been peeing on the side of the bathtub, in between the two shower curtains.

I’ve started noticing this in the mornings when I go to take a shower.  There will be a few spots on the side of the tub, and more pee inside the tub where it has run down.  I don’t really mind this, in fact I had previously wanted to encourage it because it was much easier to clean than any of the other places he’s started peeing, and it save on kitty litter!  Win-win for me!  I pretended to pout and moan about it, though, just so that he would think he was succeeding in his job at irritating me.

I think this may not be such a good thing, anymore.  I just walked into the bathroom and found cat pee on the floor.  I have deduced that there are probably occasions on which Ry-I mean THIS CAT, will go to pee on the side of the tub, and the pee will flow down the other side of the tub.  Not into the tub, but onto the floor.  I am fairly certain that is what has happened here.

No huge deal, still easier to clean than pee on the bed or the rug, but damn.  I am going crazy with all of this acting out.  I am really hoping that the problem here is that they hate the apartment and that my moving will change things, because if it doesn’t, I’m kind of at a loss.  Will I need to go to a kitty psychologist?  gah!

Just Made It!

So I just ran out of workspace shortly after the last post because the weather started to look horrendous, and I had to be at home tonight.  I didn’t want to get caught in the thunderstorm, so I decided to just bolt and not worry about keeping up with the blogathon.  I could always catch up again.

Of course I wasn’t paying attention when I got on the bus, and I ended up getting on the wrong one.  I had to walk several blocks once I got off the bus and stop for provisions (diet cola and helluva good dip), and I think I’m pretty set!  I still don’t know how I’m going to manage to finish this blogathon and do all of the cleaning I need to get done.  I may resort to even more banal blogs.

Meanwhile, the cats are happy to see me (Rygel did his happy belly-exposing roll-around), and I am happy to be back in my bed.  Hello, bed!  I missed you so, while I was gone!  Oh soft and smooshy bed, who always keeps me warm and comfy.  I love my bed, so.

…maybe this wasn’t such a good idea.

Melanie, or a close aproximation thereof.

I present, Melanie, as a clip art cat, doing the blogathon at workspace:

The Naming of Mayday

When my bunny passed away a few years ago, I suddenly had room for another animal in my life.  So I went down to the Toronto Humane Society and decided to adopt a cat.  A friend for Rygel, I thought.  How nice!

I went in and told them I wanted a female cat (less likely to fight with my male cat), who was declawed (in case they did fight, it would be fair), and who was either older or had been here for a while (less likely to find a home).  They said “We have one like that!” and lead me into the back end of the shelter and introduced me to this beautiful soft-furred lady.

As soon as they opened the cage and I gave her my finger to sniff, I knew she was mine.  She didn’t seem to be afraid of me at all; quite the opposite, she seemed to take to me immediately.  I took her home and kept her separate from Rygel so they could be introduced to each other gradually.

Later that day I thought about what I could name my new kitty.  Usually when an animal comes into my life, they do something that inspires a name, almost as though they were naming themselves.  But this new kitty wasn’t doing anything that made me shout Eureka!  So I decidd to take a different approach: I would write down a whole bunch of names that I thought were cute, put them in a hat, and pick one out.  Whatever name I picked out would apply to my lovely new kitten!

The first name I picked out was Gir.  Hmm.  Too much personality.  I chose again and got Miss Kitty Fantastico.  No, too long really.  The next name out was Muffins.  Ugh, really?  what was I thinking there?  In quick succession I also pulled out and dismissed Spot, Tattoo, Bunny, Zhan, Potato, and Sassy Pants.  Finally I picked out Mayday.  Oh.  Mayday.  Yes, that sounds really nice.  Mayday,  I like it!

And the name stuck.

For those of you who are wondering (it’s killing you, I know) Mayday is named after Spider-Man’s daughter.  Yes, Spider-Man had a daughter.  In regular (Earth 616) continuity, little May Parker was not long for this world, but in an alternate reality, May “Mayday” Parker is swining proud as the daughter of Spider-Man.

Also, she likes to sleep on my laptop and meow for no apparent reason.  I loves her.

Rygel and My So-Called Life

I just got out of bed, looked at Rygel who was laying on my bedroom floor, and said “Hey mister!  How’s it going?  Whatcha doing, buddy?  Are you having fun down there?  Are you having a time?“

He stared at me, probably wondering why I was making noises again and not making with the belly-rubbings.  I, on the other hand, flashed back to the awesome My So-Called Life.  In the first episode, right at the end, Rayanne is all “Angela!  We had a time!  Didn’t we have a time?” and Angela looks all happily thoughtful for a moment, tucks her hair behind her ear, and says, “Yeah.  We had a time.”

I swear I have the most random and obscure quotes.  That one isn’t even all that obscure (someone got it before I explained it, right?), but some of the things that I quote in my day-to-day life are almost impossible to recognize.  Some examples?

• Step this way.
• You were right.
• I cannot carry anymore!
• The books make our speaking English good.
• Use your words, dude.
• I love this show.
• I’ll be your mother now!

curious about where these quote come from?  Let’s play a little game!  I’ll list the tv shows, movies, and video games that I mined these quotes from, and you try to match up the pairs!  Oh, what fun!  Winner gets…a truly astonished response from me, since I don’t think anyone will get this.  OKAY GOGOGO!

• The Man in the Iron Mask
• Invader Zim
• Champions of Norrath
• Christmas Carol
• Into the Woods
• Buffy
• Red vs Blue